12-Oct-2011 16:53

Ryanair Travellers May Need Strong(er) Bladders!

In their latest wheeze Ryanair’s owner/chairman Michael O'Leary has announced to The Independent in London that Ryanair passengers (is that an oxymoron?) may need to tightly clench their thighs on all short-haul flights as the company plans to remove toilets from its planes!

The initial rumours last year were that this supremely ‘customer-friendly’ company wanted to charge £1 ‘per pee’ on board their Boeing 737-800 aircraft.

However, the fresh reports now suggest that the company will simply remove two of the three toilets on board & replace them with up to six seats instead...

So the great news is that not only will it take longer to board but, more importantly, all travellers with full bladders (or worse) will soon need to queue up with the other 188 passengers on board to use just the one remaining toilet.

Gives a somewhat fresh impetus to the commonly-heard riposte, “Goodness, what a crap flight!”

Mr. Michael O'Leary continued, "it would fundamentally lower air fares by about 5% for our passengers - cutting £2 off a typical £40 ticket."

This enterprising & really well-thought out proposal may be just the jump-start needed for a British Airways revival and share price jump…


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Contributed by John Paul on 26-Oct-2011 01:01
I have flown RyanAir in the past but not for years - so not up to speed with their toilet policy.
That said, I prefer Easy Jet as an economy airline or BM/BA depending on whether it's domestic or abroad for a bit more comfort and some hot food.
Thanks for highlighting this - it does seem mean.
Contributed by anna karenina on 16-Oct-2011 19:02
We always think that stating the airline is an economic choice, rather than a lifestyle choice is a good thing. If someone is prepared to spend several thousand pounds on a holiday, the last place they want to squander their money is on a flight. Similarly, if you are a small - medium business traveller, the same applies. Those with real money travel by Lear, those pretending travel other domestic & international carriers that have at least 2 toilets and a variety of specially prepared home-cooked meals (in transit, or back at the commercial kitchen) by a recognised culinary luminaire. As has been stated by someone earlier, a mass (mess) revolt would simply trigger the clean up policy, so ultimately you might have benefitted by travelling via another carrier earlier - whilst saving yourself the embarrassment.
Contributed by Katie-Ellen Hazeldine on 15-Oct-2011 22:43
If just one flightful of passengers were to agree to stage a mass Wee-In ....
Contributed by Amanda Vlahakis on 15-Oct-2011 22:42
t's a good idea, as long as passengers are made well aware when booking that the flight has xxx seats and only one toilet.

Then they can decide before they book if they are the type of passenger that can handle that or not :)

If not, book another airline instead.

Contributed by Harold Forbes on 15-Oct-2011 22:41
How many more times can he generate free publicity out of this moronic insult to his passengers?
About as many as he can convince they really are getting a flight for 50p?? Frecking idiots.
Contributed by Lisa Attias on 12-Oct-2011 21:56
So what happens to people who have a learning disability, or are some physical problem or are just feeling ill?
Contributed by Steve Hall on 12-Oct-2011 21:15
Steve Hall I flew Ryanair yesterday - 102 euros - SAS same route worse timings 330 euros. O´Leary is god! (He pretends he is anyway!) Excellent flight-----despite the best efforts of the xxxxxxxx French airtraffic blackmailers.(sorry, "controllers")
After 500+ flights, I can assure you that they are only ways of getting me from A-B. They had water and Pringles for less than a fiver, I´m totally OK with that. Their coffee is surprisingly excellent
Contributed by anna karenina on 12-Oct-2011 18:57
I return to my original comment. We offer a very affordable, efficient service uncomplicated by food, drink and toilet provision for people who are more interested in their destination than the journey. As far as the UK carriers are concerned, we always forward on disatisfied customers to BA, because we know they will pay 2+ times more for the same flight and probably still be whining - so they'll return to us anyway - some of whom we recommend fly elsewhere. On short haul flights the toilet provision has never generated customer disatisfaction and we have on occasion provided double-lined evacuation receptacles for those with weak bladders, though we generally don't publically promote this - BA's prices have often been a cause of complaint to us for disatisfied returning package customers. If I can be so forthright, buy what you pay for and expect nothing more - that way you won't have a disposition to to whine. If you were a BA frequent flyer they'd probably suggest you fly elsewhere.
Contributed by IFlyEasyJet on 12-Oct-2011 18:48
RyanAir will try just about anything to increase revenue and reduce cost - oh, and anything that gets them headlines, not just publicity. They tried a few years ago specifying 737's with only one set of window screens on one side of the plane (those pulldown plastic things), and then after being told that was against regulations, trying to schedule said planes so that they only went west! Technically they couldn't remove the public toilets, but leaving just one means that if you need the loo and can't get there in time, then its at your cost that the clean-up occurs.

Unlike Southwest Airlines - the original low cost airline - who make flying fun, RyanAir and their whole staff mimic the attitude of their boss O'Leary, and try to become a continual PiB. It must work for them, but I am sure they are powering EasyJet and others, because if theres a choice, I know which one I'd prefer to fly with: and I do!
Contributed by Cornelis on 12-Oct-2011 18:33
One thing Norman: They made you talk about it, by far the best marketing strategy ever, and imagzine, its all done by choice with a simple end: Take it or Leave it...Personally I find it briljant, curious what they think about for the future, charging for greeting you? ;-)
Contributed by SimplyFone Blogger on 12-Oct-2011 17:54
Point taken Simon.

We all weigh up the costs, pros and cons & make decisions accordingly...

For me, one sole, sad, unhygienic loo for 188 passengers (which will no doubt be out of order) is a step too far - especially with a full bladder

Contributed by Simon on 12-Oct-2011 17:30
I'm with Anna although I prefer to think of it in a different way.

Ryanair charge a baggage fee IF you bring baggage; BA charge you full price whether you bring a bag or not.

Ryanair charge for food and drink separately; BA charge you for a share of everyone's food and drink, whether you eat, drink or bring a packed lunch.

Ryanair turn your leg room into another seat to split the cost; BA charge for the extra space.

Ryan air may start charging for toilets or limiting their use, most Ryan Air flights are between 1-3 hours long... I'm sure most people can hold their bladders comfortably for this length of time... especially given they're not drinking anything on board...
Contributed by SimplyFone Blogger on 12-Oct-2011 17:25
Errr.. anna karenina (or whoever you really are..).

You are correct.
Ryanair passengers do not expect 1st class treatment at such low prices.
But, c'mon 1 single, solitary loo for 180 good folk is pushing even the boundaries of 'cattle-class' air fares!

Nope, I stand by my comments (complaints and shock) and think Ryanair are out of order...

Oh and by the way - remind me NOT to travel with you...
It may prove a somewhat smelly experience!

Contributed by anna karenina on 12-Oct-2011 17:17
What do you expect for the cheapest flights available - a red carpet first class service and gold plated toilet roll holders? Stop whining, if you want a top class flight with caviar and champagne and a dedicated toilet with hand rolled loo paper from certified sustainable sources and privately hand scrubbed toilet seats per sitting per customer 'fly elsewhere'. That's not what we offer. We offer an affordable flight to take you to your package destination. It's not about the journey, it's about the arrival.
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